So, it is officially back to school time and as of December I will be at this for a year straight and I am already freaking out.
Of course, this feels like nothing new because I am anxious all the time but still. It’s only day one and my anxiety is already through the fucking roof (this isn’t good, it can’t be good, I have two jobs that I have to figure out and school to manage and lunch to manage and being healthy to manage and I swear to god I’m already going to go insane before the week is up.
I can not be this extreme (3 courses, 2 jobs – one early morning, one late night) and survive and expect myself to come out sane at the end of it (I won’t.)
I have a lot of good things going on for me right now, I have the potential to do great this semester, but I can not do it all at once. I have desires to pay off my credit cards (this will take a couple more years) and I just… I’ve made mistakes I shouldn’t have and I did and I regret them and now I feel like I am going to die.
Not that I intend to, but I sure feel like doing so.
Until next time.