School days part one

So, it is officially back to school time and as of December I will be at this for a year straight and I am already freaking out.

 

Of course, this feels like nothing new because I am anxious all the time but still. It’s only day one and my anxiety is already through the fucking roof (this isn’t good, it can’t be good, I have two jobs that I have to figure out and school to manage and lunch to manage and being healthy to manage and I swear to god I’m already going to go insane before the week is up.

I can not be this extreme (3 courses, 2 jobs – one early morning, one late night) and survive and expect myself to come out sane at the end of it (I won’t.)

I have a lot of good things going on for me right now, I have the potential to do great this semester, but I can not do it all at once. I have desires to pay off my credit cards (this will take a couple more years) and I just… I’ve made mistakes I shouldn’t have and I did and I regret them and now I feel like I am going to die.

Not that I intend to, but I sure feel like doing so.

 

Until next time.

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The Meds Diaries 6

Dear WordPress,

It’s been a long week. I still  can’t take sass apparently. Or rather I can’t take off hand comments like “Oh, if you don’t have it, then what’s this?” 

I swear I’ve had this job long enough to know when to check for products I’m not sure we have but apparently not.

I am still kicking myself, but the urge is so much more greatly diminished than it possibly could have. Not 2 months ago, this would be affecting me for a week. But there’s no use dwelling. 

It happened once. That’s it. It was one mistake and there is no need for me to do anything stupid based on this one thing.

Anyways. It’s April. It’s been nonstop nonstop everything.

I get to take a video game course starting next month. I potentially get more hours (please) and LA in June. I am super stoked.

This is exhausting but I will manage.

Thank you for reading.